Don't Fuck with Nerds

Miss Salon Manager will soon realize that she should've listened to me when I said her wifi users were going to get her intarweb shut down. It's really unfortunate that I wasted almost an hour of my life attempting to educate her on proper internet security. I suppose I'm a tad bitter that she considered the activity 'trivial' compared to her Day Spa patrons' needs. She has a right to want to provide the best for her customers, so I guess the only thing I have to bitch about is her ignorance.
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...Dammit! I hate it when I interrupt my bitter rant with logic!

Update from 'Crossing the line'

For now, I'll call her 'Miss Clarke' since this is how I met her.

She replied warmly, just how I anticipated, that she would gladly accept my company the next time she's in town. I have yet to hear from her since that response, but there was enough content to make me think she will be, as she said, 'in touch'.

At this point, it feels like things have slipped into neutral and my engine's running idle (for lack of a better analogy). Tomorrow, I'll wish her a happy friday just to keep me fresh in her mind...maybe include a recent pic or me and my kids. My behavior would imply that I'm persuing her interests, and I guess that's not too far from the truth. Women like to be persued, just as men do and I intend to stick with this idealogy until instincts tell me otherwise.

Newsflash: I'm a phone whore!

I admit that one of my downfalls/qualities is my charisma on the phone. There are times when I feel like I can accomplish anything that needs to be done with a phone call~hell, my job revolves around fixing shit while on the phone. Unfortunately, the down-side is that I tend to talk longer on the phone than my employers would like. When the conversation's good, I keep it up and squeeze every bit of enjoyment out of it for as long as I can. It's incredibly difficult to end a conversation like that especially when I have someone equally chatty on the phone with me.

Shoot me now, please and thank you

I can't wait for the employers to do something with the CNN screen visible from my desk. I would rather watch the Weather Channel, especially if there's no sound. My suggestions to have the NASA Channel were vetoed because apparently we would lose productivity from all the Nerds watching the planet spin in peaceful bliss~maybe they were talking about me specifically? Regardless, I can feel the life being sucked from my brain every time my eyes deviate from my monitors.

Job market seems to be slower than I anticipated, but it's reminding me why I've been content to stick with my current situation for so long (besides the cheap broadband and lack of drug testing). Although I am discouraged by the lack of interest, this just means I need to step up my efforts and start sending variant resumes to specific employers.

That's all for now, have a great weekend!

Crossing the line

Where does one begin talk of such taboo things? Well, we all know that it's never a good idea to defecate where you eat, and I should know best that mixing business with pleasure rarely comes out in my favor. I bring this up because I have managed to put myself in a position to 'cross the proverbial line' once again.

Recently, I have been helping a woman get her Internet Service working (via phone) and we've talked enough about our personal lives to experience some nice chemistry. Who knows for sure how long it takes to really get a sense of this sort of thing, but sometimes, you gotta listen to your instincts. Our conversation deviated enough from personal subjects to the internet service to get the impression that we were 'probing' eachother. I know it's seriously wrong to get involved personally with your clientele, even if to only flirt with them, but I can't seem to stop myself from seeing if there's something else here.

I imagine that if I had a poor experience the first time I did this, things would be different. A few years ago, right about when my marriage was over, I had been corresponding with a woman who worked at a helpdesk we supported. There had been copious amounts of flirtation as well as some witty banter, so I knew we had chemistry pretty early in our professional relationship. She was very intelligent and you all know I'm a sucker for the smart ones. Needless to say, we eventually exchanged information and made plans to meet during the Thanksgiving holiday. Fortunately, she lived very close to where my parents reside, which brought up the semi-innocent comment of 'Let's have drinks sometime...' that started the whole meet idea.

She met me at the train station since she lived very close to the beach and she took me to a fantastic Mexican restaurant (we both already knew about). She knew what I looked like since I had sent her a recent pic of me, but all I had to recognize her was a pic of her tattoo and a brief description of herself. Although I had no idea what she looked like, I knew our conversation would be enough to salvage the situation if we didn't find any physical attraction present. I have been out with more attractive women in my days, but she carried herself with confidence and humility. As the evening began to close, she invited me to her home for drinks. I had a feeling we'd end up having sex, but I had no idea how much of a sexual creature she was until we had our clothes off. The next day, after wake-up sex, post wake-up sex, pre-breakfast sex, and post-breakfast sex in the shower, she took me home, well fucked, to my parent's house.

The next few days, when I could get away from my family obligations, I visited her for more animilistic sex until I had to go home to Northern California. Overall, it was a great time and she even let me leave with the words, 'I don't expect you to call me' and 'I had a wonderful time with you.' By her setting the level of expectation, I could leave without feeling like I owed her much more than appreciation of her fucktastic sex drive and of course, her company. In retrospect, I wish I had called her again after that, but I think we both got out of it what we wanted. I still think about her and appreciate how she made me feel. My ego had been stroked to erection, ejaculation, and back again multiple times, so I felt like a desirable man once again when I left.

So there you have it...y'know, without all the raunchy details, which I'm sure some of you would squirm in your seats if you knew what we did in the span of a few days. Anyway, with this recent woman, she has specifically mentioned that she has occasional business very close to where I live. She also mentioned that she is single and even tactfully asked about my status as a bachelor. When I finally fixed her internet service, I felt a little disappointed that it ended so quickly. On impulse, I called her back later to ask for her email address so I could send her something. That's 'innocent' and manages to be obvious enough for her to know that I would like to have contact with her outside of the professional life. She has not returned my call as of yet, but I have good vibes that she'll oblige with her information.

Maybe it will work out like the last woman I met, and maybe it wont. It is a little weird that they share the same name, but that's not why I'm acting on this impulse.

Shitty intentions

I'm sure it's probably not smart of me to be reviewing the job listings while here at work, but at this point, I'm rather indifferent if I'm discovered.

Recently, I've made some progress with updating my resume. I was shocked to see how long it had been since I even looked at it. At least it's finally out of the way. With how much I've been hating my job lately, it's amazing how long it took me to finally blow the dust off it (the resume, not my sex life).

Step 2, probably the easiest part of looking for another job, is to open up your internet browser and search for 'jobs'. Other than that Apple Computer Guy, you'll find a number of useful recruitment websites eager to pimp you out. Back during the Dotcom boom, you couldn't leave your resume on one of these sites for a day without someone calling you about a job. *sigh* Those were the days. Thankfully, the job market has picked up here in Cal, so my chances of finding something else are pretty high.

This will be a rare opportunity for me to search for a job while I'm currently employed. I'm quite excited to be in this position since it's much easier to interview when you already have a job. Before, I have always been at a stage of desperation with finding another job, and that can only hurt you during the searching/interview process.

It will be interesting to see what kind of bites I get when I resign myself to choosing a job website. I can't see myself using more than one, maybe two because it takes too long to sort through the current job listing at just one site.

Anyway, I'm tired of this fucking job and I'm starting to do something about it. Wish me luck!

Is it Friday already?

The weekend turned out to be enjoyable despite helping my ex and the kids move to another part of their city. It wasn't a long move, but I was occupied for most of the day with hard labor. I happened to see my brother-in-law and his wife while I was there. It occurred to me how long it's been since I've seen either of them~I'd say at least 4 years. They looked good, like time had treated them with some care. They said it was nice to see me too and seemed quite genuine about it.

Seeing them again reminded me that my relationship with my ex wasn't really that bad in comparison with others. Don't get me wrong, I don't think I could ever share a life with my ex-wife, but it's nice to say that you don't regret it (and mean it).

Now that the holiday times are over, I can feel the weight of it slowly disappating. It could be that I'm spending more time sleeping and less time recovering from hangovers, but that's just speculation.

CNN at work is bad for the digestion

Anyone whose known me for a while would be able to tell you that the last channel I'd ever watch (willingly) is the news channels. I specifically avoid the news channels for the following reasons:

- Valid content: Who knows for sure that any of the things they show are entirely true? It's a well-known fact that our Media is controlled by the Government. What they don't want us to know will not be known.

- Infotainment: I'm stealing this terminology because it's so fucking accurate. Would anyone watch the news if they talked about boring things?

- Advertisements: This is something I hate about all TV programs which is why DVR/Tivo is the greatest contribution to TV culture since the Sports Bra.

- Repetition: Just in case you missed everything they talked about in the last 30 minutes, we'll regurgitate it for you again all freaking day with different footage!

- It's depressing as hell: Ignorance is bliss...and now you know why I named this blog 'blogus ignoramus'. Is it odd to have pride in your own ignorance?

- Not enough nudity: This is self-explanitory. There are countries where the News crew strips while they speak...I would like to live there or at least get the news feed.

- Not enough swearing: Just think...how entertaining would that be if you heard someone from the news say, 'Today, violence again struck the middle east...what a fucking surprise.'?

- Too Serious: I guess I just admitted that I like the 'Daily Show' and 'the Colbert Report'.

The reason I bring this up now is because my work has installed new network monitors in the form of 46" flat screens. Currently, they're showing CNN and the Weather Channel which, in my opinion, is a bad idea. Sure I could just 'look away' like I do with everything else, but it's still in my peripheral vision. *grumbles* Why can't they change it to the 'Nasa' Channel, or even the Cartoon network? Oh yeah, that's too much of a distraction...y'know, like blogging can be~*looks over his shoulder*

And now for something completely different

It has been said that we should focus solely on the positive things in our life and not sweat the crap we have no control to change. The analytical beast in me ran with the idea of things I cannot change and came up with a list:

- My penis size: Nobody ever says they're happy with their penis size and truly means it.

- My height: I'm not the tallest male in my family, but then again, I'm not the shortest. At 5'7", I enjoy being eye level with most tall women's cleavage~rumor has it, they like that too.

- Politics: This would require too much effort with little return for me to attempt to change.

- My love life: or I should say 'lack thereof'. Forcing change in this element seems to only cause more problems than making any improvements to my life. I'm letting this part just coast since it frustrates me much less.

- Other drivers: Drivers who use both of their feet to drive, AND they have automatic transmission. Who the fuck drives with their foot on the break and the other on the Accellerator? Killing people on the road warrants too harsh of a penalty. 'But they deserved it' would not be a reasonable excuse.

- Other people: No matter how much we think it will improve their lives, we should only intervene when they are a threat to others (or kittens).

- Fate: I'm still trying determine if this is real or not. I believe things simply happen and there's not a thing we can do to prepare ourselves for it.

- Time: I intend to enjoy it for as long as I'm alive. I also intend to show my children how important it is they are efficient with theirs. Ironically, I received very poor marks in my educational background for not using my time wisely. *shrugs*

- Physics: Unfortunately, I am still getting over not being able to control this element.

In retrospect, I guess I do have control over more things than I give myself credit. I scratched off the list quite a few things that I later deduced were, in fact, in my control. Maybe making lists is what I need to do when I need to take inventory of my life.

Completely off the subject, I have been trying to influence my childrens' musical tastes. My son likes rock, which is a good start. He enjoys Green Day and the Killers so far. The daughter has been a little harder to please with music. She hates classical (almost cried when she said that), but seems to like No Doubt and Kelly Clarkeson.

The son made me laugh out loud when I attempted to get them to listen to Madonna's 'Holiday'. I asked them, 'Do you guys know who Madonna is?' The boy replied, 'Yeah, she's Old!'. There you have it...life from the viewpoint of an 11yr old boy.

Okay, enough rambling for me. Hope you're all doing well!

Funk-a-fied

I'm intending this to be a rather dark and moody post. I didn't bother with spell/grammar check. You have been forewarned.

Where do I start? I suppose I should catch everyone up on where I am in life at the moment.
This weekend, I was back in my old stomping grounds...good ol' San Diego. Wish I could say it was for leisure, but that'd be a big dirty fib. I initially committed to going down there (for the weekend of the 5th) to pick up my kids and travel back home with them. Fate intervened by having my great uncle pass away last week. The funeral/wake, happened to coincide with when I was intending to be down there, so I guess it worked out better that way. I wasn't very close with this side of the family, but we shared a lot of history, enough to show my face and pay my respects.

We (the extended and immediate family) all met at their home, one that they owned for longer than I have been alive. Their children and grandchildren provided boxes and boxes of photographs from the history of their lives. The place smelled the same as it did the decade before, which was probably the last time I visited. Memories filled my no-longer-as-pot-stained brain as I walked through my great aunt's house.

Over all, I'd say it was an enjoyable family gathering. I saw many people I haven't seen in forever, shared good memories of times past, and caught up on where we are at present.
Needless to say, I'm flooded with thoughts of past, present, future. For now, I'm holding together, but I am feeling the need to break down so I have an excuse to put it all back in place. It's good to let go like this, at least for me, especially when so many things intrude on me at once.

Missing my girlfriend, proverbally speaking

I'm in mental conflict at the moment with my relationships (or lack thereof). It seems that everywhere I look, there are people enjoying the fruits of being with someone. Everyone, of course, but me. I'm sure i'm wrong about this, but it doesn't change how I feel about it. Could it be the holiday times that make me desire to have someone to keep me warm? Would I even be capable of maintaining a relationship that didn't just revolve around sex? *shrugs* I don't feel like I could at this point with as much as I miss being in one.

As a favor to me, I ask that you don't offer me any solutions on how to find the right woman or comfort me in my time of darkness. It will pass once the other things on my mind are resolved.
The purpose of this is to get the thoughts out and it helps just to share that I am Human despite my protests.

Other miscellaneous crap

Lately, I have been giving the thought of a career change a try. My resume, after it's done should give me some options to consider with respect to what I'd like to do. The most important element should be my interest in my job. History has shown that if I don't find something interesting about it, I will deteriorate to mediocrity and eventually start looking elsewhere. My wages haven't gone up as quickly as I want and I could definitely use a significant pay increase. I think i've earned it, but the company isn't interested in keeping people happy, so maybe it's time to move on to greener pastures.

Speaking of green pastures, I haven't been smoking as much lately. Yay, I guess. I wonder if my funk is related to this? Denial would say 'no' because it further proves that it's mentally addictive or that I'm using it to forget about all the things I worry about on a daily basis. Denial or not, I've got more problems than me liking to toke on occasion, which was the whole motivation behind slowing down my in-take in the first place.

I'm not all that anxious about fixing my computer at the moment. By the time I get home from work lately, the last thing I want to do is touch my computer. It's sucked up so much of my time, I am ashamed to admit it. I haven't really settled on something to fill the time gap I used for pc gaming. I guess that's what I've been trying to figure it out while I gorge myself on the Sopranos series and other goodies on DVD.

Anyway, if you ask me, I'd tell you that I haven't been doing anything very interesting lately other than spend lots of time not doing what I used to do.

Christmas was cool. The kids got spoiled by yours truly and my parents as usual. They're glad to be home with their mother after being down in San Diego for their entire Winter break. The train ride back with them was uneventful, and I am proud of them for hanging in there for the whole 10 hour trip.

Blogging has been nearly impossible for me to do lately because I don't feel like I have anything nice to say. Who wants to hear someone bitch about their life all the time? Not I. I admit this motivation probably wont do for an excuse, but it's all I have at this point. My writing always seems to sputter when so many issues are inundating me. I appreciate that you all still visit even though I don't feel like i've had much to say.

That's all I have to say right now. Hope you're all doing well.